Paul,
I love YOUR response. I could not have said it better myself.

Interesting fact. For many years, I followed a very strong personal and professional growth path. Studied with the best of them: Wayne Dyer (in the early years before spirituality grabbed his heart, LOL), Tony Robbins, and more. I even had a success coach who guided me in setting goals, self-motivation, making money. Once all that was accomplished, I realized my life was still lacking something. I couldn't figure out what it was, as I had done all the "right stuff" according to the experts.

I realized I had not fostered a relationship with Spirit. There was no rich spiritual life and it felt like a desert inside of me. That is when I embarked on my spiritual path (with more wonderful mentors, some of whom I feature in Your Truest Self). My life began to feel truly rich and full and alive and joyful. That was when my life completely changed, so I agree with you that it is about finding ways that nurture your spirit--ways that keep you calm, clear, and wise, so you CAN live a good and meaningful life.

So glad you stopped in.

Hi Cindy,
Oh, I love your transparency. I think you and I suffer from much of the same angst, especially because we are writers. There is great pressure to always be fresh, new, attract new readers, stay on the top of the list.

Sometimes fallow times are vital for our growth. Fallow times can be long too, sometimes years, and it is important to notice our resistance to them. For me, it has been 2 years since I completed Your Truest Self. I told myself I'd have another book ready right after that. Guess what, there isn't one! When we are so busy creating all the time, so busy carrying around that big backpack of beliefs that we should do and be more, nothing much good comes of it. Especially fresh ideas and passion...

Can I make a really direct suggestion? If your family can afford it, stop for a while. Do the basics but don't launch out into anything new. Putz, dabble, do your art, work on your house, etc. Just be Cindy...Take each day as it comes and enjoy it to the fullest. Pack up all the "shoulds" and put them in a trunk in the attic. They'll still be there if you want to unpack them again. (But I doubt you will after some down time.)

In time, likely, the Muse and your passion will return and no one will be able to stop you. And if nothing comes, that's fine too. Can YOU be alright with that? Is it possible that the next leg of your journey is not about working at all, but BEING? Allow the Spirit to lead and take you where he/she/it wants you to go. What an adventure!

The best year of my life was the year I took off to recover my health. This year (2009), in fact, I have not done much of anything creatively except meet basic deadlines and do marketing. The Muse is actually starting to speak again after a long fallow period and some great ideas are coming. And they are not about reinventing myself. They are about writing and teaching about what I am truly passionate about in this very moment. But I couldn't have come to that clarity without down time.

Sending hugs!

Hi Allison,
Can I tell you a secret? I have the busiest mind on the planet. Truly! I actually wrote an entire article on this and I think I would like to post it here, if you don't mind. It gives a number of strategies of how to move beyond, "I can't meditate!" a common mantra these days.

Unfortunately, many of us have been sold a phony bill of goods: that we should we able to sit down and get quiet and access inner peace, even sail into bliss. Not good, nor true! A very simple practice of connecting with the breath and just noticing our thoughts rising and falling away is all meditation really is. Breathing, being gentle with ourselves, and when our thoughts wander, just bringing them back to the present moment, to the breath. That is all meditating is. In time, with practice, we do have fewer thoughts, and less worry about those thoughts. We feel better, are more relaxed, and at ease. I do hope this helps....

Hold It Down in There!
Simple Strategies to Quiet a Busy Mind


Experts say that we think, on the average, 60,000 thoughts a day. I know from experience that I must think many more that that. My mind moves so fast at times you would think I was speed reading the world! It has taken time, dedication, and practice for me to be able to quiet my mind, but, thankfully, I have.

I never thought that I could, truthfully, for I was one of nearly four million people— one-third of all Americans—who have experienced anxiety. Anxiety disorder is, in fact, the most common emotional disorder, and is more common than alcohol abuse or depression.* Having anxiety is no picnic; it can be quite debilitating. I should know. I struggled with it for many years, I still do on occasion, but it no longer demoralizes me, or dominates my life. I believe an anxious body/mind is something we can work with if we are willing to learn how.

Where to Begin

The pace at which we move through our days contributes to having a dearth of thoughts. The faster we go, the more we have to think about, the more we have to focus on “what’s next.” At the peak of my anxiety, I was mothering three small children, struggling with a part-time career, volunteering, and spending lots of time in the car—playing chauffeur, running errands to keep a busy household afloat. I lived by “To-Do” lists and sticky notes pasted on the dashboard of my car.

Thankfully, I had a breakthrough in understanding that the faster I went, the faster my heart raced. So did my thoughts. When I took the time to slow down, I felt better. Consciously slowing down—actually walking, driving, even speaking more slowly—began to have a positive effect upon me, and life stopped spinning, as did my mind.

Quiet Mind Strategy #1:
Begin to physically slow down. Notice how quickly you engage in any activity—especially simple actions like preparing a meal, cleaning the house, or answering e-mails—and try to do them more slowly, with focused attention, with intentional awareness. Then notice how much better you feel. Moving more slowly takes practice, for most of us are hardwired to function in high gear. We have been conditioned to get things done quickly, so the default setting of our body/mind system is “move!” Time and repatterning are required to shift into a lower gear, but it can be done. Truly, slow can be good for what ails us, and may be precisely what the doctor ordered for recurring and consistent stress—especially anxiety.

A second very powerful course of action we can take is to begin to notice the subject of our busy thoughts—and where they lead us. Are they worry thoughts or fear thoughts? Are they repetitive thoughts? Do they keep us stuck in brain looping, an annoying state whereby our mind keeps telling us the same old thing, repeating the same stories, over and over again? No matter the quality of our thoughts, or their repetitive nature, refocusing them, redirecting them can be very powerful.

Instead of allowing our thoughts to run amok, going wherever they want to go, we can begin to work with them. When a skilled shepherd notices that one of his flock has wandered away, he will expertly guide it back into the fold. We, too, can corral our wild mind in much the same way.

Quiet Mind Strategy #2
It takes practice to notice the nature of our thoughts—to be their observer—and gently guide them in a more positive direction. One technique that can help is to connect with a phrase that calms us. Said silently, we repeat it gently again and again to ourselves for as long as it takes for us to settle down. We engage this process not from our head, but from our heart. We drop our awareness down into that deeper place; we allow the phrase itself to "breathe" through our heart. This phrase can be an affirmation, a song lyric, a scripture, a mantra; a positive “something” that holds our attention; something that has meaning for us.

I have a few favorites that work just fine for me. Singing softly to myself, “I am safe, I am loved, I am free,” is one of them, a lyric from a favorite Kenny Loggins’ song. Another such phrase is: “Inner peace is mine, one step at a time.” I’ve been sharing this one quite successfully with women at the retreats I lead. In fact, I received a lovely e-mail the other day from one participant who shared how she had taken the phrase and personalized it. She decided to say, instead: “Inner peace is mine, one breath at time,” knowing that peace of mind is, indeed, just a breath away. She told me that the practice of saying it this way was transforming her. “I came home to myself,” she wrote. “Once again I discovered the benefits of an open mind and open spirit.”

There are many such strategies you can use to quiet your mind, to calm yourself, so that your truest self can begin to emerge. Your truest self is a peaceful, serene, and collected woman; you at your personal best, feeling centered, at peace in your world. Each of us, by birth and destiny, are meant to be calm of body, mind, and heart. We just don’t take the time to propagate the practices that can lead us there. We continue to live on autopilot, frantically tugged here and there by an increasingly fast pace of life—one that will inevitably create an overly busy mind and anxiousness.

To free ourselves from the disabling effects of too many thoughts, we must, first and foremost, want relief—and want it badly enough to change our habits and cultivate new, more beneficial ones. If this article finds you drowning in a sea of thoughts and you desire relief, rescue yourself, cultivate self-calming practices, and join me on more peaceful shores. Truly, it’s a very nice place to live ...

~~~~~
Looking for more strategies to quiet your busy mind? Join Jan at www.michiganwomensforum.com for a “Pocket of Peace,” or on her blog, www.awakeisgood.blogspot.com for daily assistance with accessing inner calm.


*Source: Anxiety Disorders Resource Center, www.anxietypanicattack.com

©2008, Janice Lynne Lundy. Please do not reprint without written permission. Contact me via e-mail: jan@awakenedliving.com. Thank you!

Paul,

Yes, I've been trying to discern this for a while. I think I embraced the notions in so many of these Law Of Attraction kind of books. But I see that they are true, as far as they go. I've decided that persistence, hard work and focus are necessary, but not sufficient. Success in anything requires those things, but just those alone don't ensure success, whatever that may be for an individual.

I guess it's the Divine who may have other ideas, or permutations of your idea :) A Sufi friend of mine always said the Divine knows what is in your highest good which may be different than your desires.

So today, I'm believing life is a combination of all the above, and developing the wisdom and listening skills to hear when you may need to adjust course, or the course is adjusting on you. :)

Allison

Ah, Jan, well I'm not sure I realized the truths were in a kind of order. That makes sense.

Yes, I certainly see that many of these 'success' books are geared toward money. Money is important. But I agree, it does not by any stretch ensure 'success'. A funny story...I do want to become the kind of person who is financially successful. I love business and figuring out how it works, but I have some lessons to learn about doing things that are not just fun, but have money making potential if that's as important to me as I believe.

I remember breaking down about a year ago to buy a lotto ticket because the pot was $150 + million. I never expect to win, it's just cheap entertainment dreaming what I'd do with it (give it away). I saw the next morning someone, not me, had won it. I griped a bit to the universe and immediately, the reply popped in my head, 'but you said you wanted to become the kind of person who could make money', a very different thing than having lots dropped in your lap. I laughed at that because it was so true.

Funny that I want to become a kind of person, but expect to just suddenly be that person, silly me. ;) At least I've come far enough now to see that I AM becoming the person I want to be. The Universe IS giving me exactly what I asked for, the process.

It makes me laugh and in fact right now, I'm feeling a deep wave of gratitude for it even as I write.

Allison

Allison,
I absolutely agree with you here. I believe the technical term is "co-creativity." We do our part, the Divine (Universe) does its part. I love the Sufi quote you share here. It sure rings true to my heart! We may think we know what we want, but then... There is wisdom greater than our own. I do not doubt that at all.

Another quote I like is the one that says something like, "Thank God not all of our prayers our answered." What foolish things many of us have prayed for!